‘Ok so we need a framework,’ Kabir said to Juhi as he handed her the ice cream cone. ‘We can’t just freewheel this. It has to be legit.’

It had been two days since their first date, and the two of them were now sitting in a park near the same cafe, eating ice cream together.

Juhi licked at her ice cream and thought about it. ‘You really are such a nerd. What do you mean a “framework”?’

‘Y’know, like a plan or something,’ Kabir said as he shrugged his shoulders.

‘So just call it that. “Framework” doesn’t really make sense here,’ Juhi said.

‘Sure it does,’ Kabir replied.

‘Oh wow, Mr. Smarty pants over here,’ Juhi said and went back to her ice cream.

Kabir opened his mouth to argue, closed it, then opened it again. ‘You know… we’re already arguing like a proper couple. I think this can actually work.’

Juhi giggled. ‘Ok ok so — we do need a plan. What do we need? What’s the first thing we need?’

Kabir thought. ‘Evidence,’ he said, ‘that’s the first thing we need.’

Juhi’s eyes lit up. ‘Yes,’ she said, ‘We’ll need pics. Lots of them. And some of them will need to go up on Insta.’

‘Ohhh,’ Kabir said, ‘we’ll need stories. More than posts, we’re going to need stories. That will really make it all seem authentic.’

Juhi’s eyes widened. ‘Oh shit — that’s actually the first thing. I post way too many stories. If more than half of them aren’t about us, it won’t seem genuine enough.’

‘And I’ll tell you what else will make it really genuine. You post the stories, and I re-share them,’ Kabir said.

Juhi turned to him with an expression that looked like someone had forced her to eat a lemon. ‘What the hell is re-share?’ she asked.

Kabir waved his hand around. ‘Y’know re-share, re-post whatever. I’m uh, I don’t really post on Insta all that much. I just use it to watch random reels.’

‘Oh that’s good too,’ Juhi said immediately, “We should also share those lovey dovey cringey reels to each other. And don’t worry I’ll send you some in the beginning. Your algo should then do the rest.’

Kabir stopped eating his ice cream and made a face as if he was about to cry, ‘Oh wow… you really are so considerate my dear fake girlfriend.’

Juhi laughed. ‘Oh shut up,’ she said.

‘But I don’t get it,’ he said as he went back to eating his ice cream, ‘Why do we need to do that again?’

Now Juhi made a face as if she was about to cry, ‘Oh you dear dumb boy,’ she said, ‘You and I will like those reels, and when those reels come across other people, they’ll see we liked them, and they’ll think we’re happily in paradise.’

Kabir’s eyes widened. ‘Oh… oh you’re bad. You’re like an evil mastermind. That’s actually such a good touch. You’re really committed to this aren’t you?’

Juhi shrugged. ‘I mean if you’re going to do something, might as well do it properly.’

Kabir stared at her. This was one of those moments when he thought if circumstances were different, maybe he would’ve actually liked to —

He shook his head.

‘Absolutely,’ he said then, ‘I think we more or less covered everything didn’t we?’

Juhi thought a bit. ‘Add WhatsApp statuses to the list, and I think we’re set.’

‘Done,’ Kabir said, ‘Actually we only ended up thinking of social media. We need to add more… substance to it.’

‘Like?’ Juhi asked.

‘Like random couple things — like uh y’know, nicknames and internal jokes,’ Kabir said.

‘Oooh yes. And having our favourite places. And stuff like knowing each other’s favourite meals and all that,’ Juhi added.

‘And also our pet peeves. Especially when it comes to food. Like something you order but I hate and I order and you hate. Or something like you hating that I eat all your fries or something y’know,’ Kabir added.

‘Damn I think we’re going to need to make a list soon,’ Juhi said.

Kabir laughed. ‘And I thought this couldn’t get any more fun.’

Juhi giggled. ‘Oh god of course you love making lists.’

‘Alright this all looks good to start with. What’s next?’ he asked.

‘Actual dates,’ Juhi said, ‘because all of this comes later. First we need to go on the dates and take pics.’

‘Actually,’ Kabir said, “we should be picking places with the best views. I mean think about it, it’s so obvious — the better the place, the better the pics, the better the whole thing will look on Insta. We really should be taking a leaf from these influencer and Insta celebs’ books.’

Juhi laughed loudly. ‘Wow really? I mean I love the idea but at this point I’m starting to feel you might end up putting more effort into this than your actual studies. Please I really don’t want to feel guilty for anything ok?’

‘Nono it’s fine,’ Kabir said, ‘Trust me I don’t think I’ll actually even get ideas later. I think it’s because we’re brainstorming right now so it’s all just coming to me.’

Juhi smiled and nodded.

And the two of them sat there and brainstormed for the next hour and a half.

And that turned into them executing the plan, and putting very real efforts into their very fake dating.

And that turned into Gargi almost losing consciousness from happiness when Juhi told her that she and Kabir were continuing to go out.

And that turned into Kabir finally talking back to his friends and telling them to stop bothering him so he could actually focus on his studies as well, because clearly it had turned out to be way too easy for him to get a gf, after all.

And that turned into Kabir’s friends taking his case even more, because they refused to believe him.

And Kabir cursed himself for bragging a little too much. And when his friends refused to stop, saying he most likely went on a date or two, and was blowing things out of proportion, he sneakily texted Juhi and told her he really needed her to send him a selfie or something — anything that would get these guys to shut up once and for all.

Juhi refused that. Because she said she had something even better in mind. She told him to act casual and when she calls, just follow her lead.

Fifteen minutes later, she called him, and within a few moments Kabir realised that Gargi was there too. And what proceeded was a very typical childish conversation where Gargi kept teasing him about Juhi. And Kabir, for his part, kept replying in an overly shy and playful manner.

It was all very childish, and also very effective. His friends accepted that he might just have gotten a gf for good now. And Kabir breathed a sigh of relief, knowing they would be off his back for good now.

And then for good measure, Juhi sent him a selfie as well, which he happily showed off to his friends.

And that turned into a month of serene peace for both of them.

And that turned into a moment where Kabir half-jokingly and half-seriously brought up the topic of sex. He said that since this was a technical arrangement in a way, and for now they couldn’t afford to be seen with anyone other than each other, perhaps it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to introduce no-strings intimacy.

And that made Juhi laugh hard. She said they needed to be careful, since it was important to keep things professional right? And that made Kabir say while she was totally right, perhaps it could also be that she was afraid he would ruin her for other men. And that made Juhi absolutely guffaw with laughter until her stomach hurt, while Kabir sat, waiting for her to stop, with a bored and sullen expression on his face.

And that turned into them going to parties together, and be glad that they no longer had to worry about prying questions about their love lives. It also made them realise something else.

Like a person from a small city only realises what they’ve been missing out in their life after they move to a big city — and experience the crazy amount and diversity of mouth-watering-cholesterol-causing fast foods, and then can no longer imagine a life without it, Juhi and Kabir also experienced a similar feeling.

It was only after they went to these events together that they realised just how glad they were for the company. How simply and amazingly nice it felt to have someone just to be with at these events.

And they both felt something tingle at the back of their necks, and jump around in their stomachs. And they both buried those feelings, ignoring them.

And that one brainstorming session turned into multiple dates in various photogenic locations, too many corny reels, even more cheesy pictures, just enough number of Insta stories, and three months of joyful memories.

And then it turned into something more.

But at this point, neither of them realised this. They were too busy having real fun with their fake arrangement.

In the first few weeks, both of them were soldiers on a mission. They were very clearly focused on what the next best thing would be to make their relationship seem as authentic to outsiders as possible. As such, every date and hang-out was a calculated move, played with a precision that would make competitive chess players cry tears of overwhelming pride.

As a result, they never really spent any time together that was only for the sake of… spending time together. They didn’t really know much about each other.

And considering what both of them wanted, things should’ve stayed that way.

It is said that girls are generally smarter than boys.

Whoever said it was right. Because it was Juhi who first felt the wisps of suspicion that this whole situation of theirs might just be starting to get out of hand.

One particular evening, as the two of them said their goodbyes and parted ways, it was Juhi who realised that this was the first time their “date” had gone differently from before. They hadn’t taken a single pic, hadn’t posted a single story, and definitely hadn’t talked about the next best move in their perfect master plan, as if they were a couple of meticulous supervillains, carefully drafting the steps in their very important world domination scheme.

In place of all that, they actually, literally, just had a nice and normal date between two people who enjoyed each other’s company and had spent a really good time together.

Juhi did not like this.

It made her worry a little bit. But the good thing was that, as mentioned before, Juhi was smart. And so it was very easy for her brain to come up with a justification.

And it went like this: they were spending too much time together, and had gone on enough number of dates by this time. It was only normal that they would end up just hanging out on at least one of them. They weren’t robots, after all. They were people. And people hung out with other people. Simple as that. There was nothing more between them.

It was a really good justification too. And it worked. Juhi smiled to herself, sighed, and happily went to sleep. Ignorance truly is blissful.

But this didn’t last long.

Juhi’s justification was destroyed with the same intensity and certainty that academic institutions do in today’s world, to stamp out the creative and artistic spirit in kids.

This happened when, one evening, Kabir arrived to pick her up for a party they were going to. Juhi had her hands full because she was holding a large box wrapped in birthday paper for the host of this particular party. Kabir immediately got out, ran to the other side and opened the door for her.

It wasn’t like this impressed her or anything. Well, it did, but not too much. It was a very normal thing to do after all.

While she tried to take care of the gift and sit in the car, her high heel seemed to get caught in something on the road and she stumbled. And Kabir immediately grabbed her so she wouldn’t fall down.

Juhi would not have really felt anything had he held her by the arm. But he didn’t. In his hurry to hold her before she keeled over, Kabir accidentally held her by her waist.

It should be mentioned here that Juhi had definitely gone on dates before. Some of them had even been quite successful. And so Kabir wasn’t the first guy to hold her waist.

But he was definitely the first guy who made her face suddenly feel hot. He was the first guy who, as a result of his hand gently placed on her waist, made her stare at him wide eyed, then blink a lot, and then laugh out loud in nervousness and immediately try to regain her balance and stand up straight.

Life has a tendency to do things in such a way that would make us think there might really be a God-like entity, who actively takes interest in mortal affairs, and writes out scenarios that hit us when we’re most vulnerable.

Juhi had not yet recovered from what just happened and quietly sat in the passenger seat. Kabir went around, sat in the driver seat and asked her, ‘Ready to go gf?’ and snickered like a dumb little kid. She only silently nodded. Then he looked at her curiously, said, ‘Um wait, let me fix that,’ and held his hand out.

She saw his hand arrive towards her face in slow motion.

Her heart began to beat faster as his fingers gently touched a lock of hair that, as a result of her stumble, was now hanging in front of her right eye. Her hands clutched the gift tighter as he pushed it out of her face. Her heart threatened to burst out of her chest as his fingers accidentally caressed her face when he tucked the lock of hair behind her ear. And her lungs refused to breathe properly even after he was done and they were well on their way to the party.

In a weird way, Juhi realised, this was much worse than when he held her waist.

Throughout the drive to the place, the party, and the drive back home, Juhi was distracted. It seemed that her mind only started to work when she was alone in her room and getting ready to go to bed.

And after thinking about everything that had happened, and how it had made her feel, her mind came up with one word that perfectly summarised the whole situation for her.

‘Shit,’ she muttered as she closed her eyes and tried to sleep.

***